leadership mastery – Dutra Associates

Navigating the Emotional Roller Coaster of Change Transitions

April 16, 2020 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

“Who are you?” said the Caterpillar…
“I – I hardly know, Sir, just at present,” Alice replied rather shyly, “at least I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have changed several times since then.”

Lewis Carroll
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland¹

What have you felt since COVID-19 impacted nearly every corner of our world and every aspect of our lives? Have there been days when you’ve felt a bit like Alice – changing multiple times throughout the day? I know I have.

Over the last couple of months, we have experienced change unlike any other we’ve been exposed to in our lifetime. To successfully navigate through this time as a leader, you must take a step back to recognize and acknowledge the full impact of the changes raining down upon us. Then, choose how you wish to respond and manage the impact on you as well as on your team. In other words, logic and action alone aren’t enough to save the day. We must pay attention to the emotional roller coaster that accompanies all change, particularly the drastic changes we are currently facing.

Bridges’ Transition Model

Many researchers have explored and written about change and its’ effect on people. What they have all discovered are patterns in how we react and respond to change that are quite consistent across the human experience. The model that I have used most extensively with leaders is William Bridges’ 3 Stage Transition Model consisting of Endings – Neutral Zone – New Beginnings.

Change vs Transition

Before we look at each of the stages, let’s make a distinction between change and transition. What tends to create the challenge for us isn’t the change itself but the process of adjusting to it and moving from the old reality to the new. You see, change is external, situational, and often out of our control. In this case, the COVID-19 pandemic is the external change. The internal emotional and psychological process we go through to come to terms with the change is the transition. Consequently, we must turn our attention to the transition process. It is within this process that we will find what we can control – our response.

Endings

In Bridge’s model the first phase is Endings. This phase begins with the external event and our realization that the change is really happening. So, think back to when you first learned about COVID-19. Then, consider what occurred when it first hit your country. Then, your local area. Then, perhaps you or someone you know. At what point did you realize that we truly had a pandemic on our hands? When did you find yourself moving from the known to the unknown? This is when your Endings phase began. You likely experienced any number of emotions including denial, anger, fear, anxiety, grief, frustration or depression. Cycling between these emotions is common as well (e.g. anger one moment, fear the next). You may still be experiencing them.

Keep in mind that your colleagues and team members were and are experiencing their own emotions. What can you do to support those around you during this stage and help them to let go of the way things were?

Acknowledge and validate the emotions that others are experiencing
Articulate what is actually coming to an end. Determine what might be lost as a result of the change and what might stay the same
Communicate, communicate, communicate

Neutral Zone

The Neutral Zone represents the phase of transition where we have started to let go of the old way of being but haven’t yet found our footing in a new reality. Typical emotions that arise during this phase include uncertainty, confusion, overwhelm or frustration. While there is a lack of a solid foundation in this phase, we do begin to experiment with new possibilities. Using our COVID-19 example again, you might find yourself feeling a bit numb, overtired, struggling to get used to working from home, or overwhelmed by suddenly becoming your children’s teacher. Yet, you’re also beginning to realize that what you are feeling is natural – that you are not alone. As you move through this phase, you gain perspective and more effectively cope with uncertainty which allows you to begin to see possibilities for taking positive action.

Everyone moves through this phase at a different pace. Don’t try to rush it. As a leader, you can support others by:

Continuing to listen and communicate
Trying new things
Encouraging the progress that people are making
Giving yourself and others time to process

Beginnings

The final stage of the model is New Beginnings. This phase is marked by acceptance of the change and a renewed sense of energy that propels action. When we have successfully moved into the New Beginning, we have embraced the new reality and started to experience solid ground again. In our example, our teams will have adjusted to a new way of working, established a new structure to their day, and found a new rhythm. Creative ways of contributing to the team begin to emerge along with new ways of doing business. During this phase, emotions shift in a more positive direction. You might be feeling excitement, optimism, and a greater sense of motivation.

What can you do to support people in this stage?

Set an intention for how you choose to move forward
Encourage others to continue taking small steps each day
Stay focused on solutions versus problems
Proactively offer and ask for support from others

Conclusion

Viewing transition in terms of William Bridges’ three stages helps you understand that the needs, challenges and opportunities presented by change can be managed as a progression of responses. Your ability to understand this and apply it to yourself as well as to help your team transition during change will go a long way to making any type of change you deal with less daunting.

Where are you in the process of change? Where is your team? What might you do today to accept where you and others are in the process and to navigate your way successfully through the massive change we are experiencing?

Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. New York: Signet Books, 1960, 47.

Reference:
Bridges, William. Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes, 2^nd Edition. Boston, MA: Da Capo Press, 2004.

About the Author: Sherry Dutra is a Talent Development, Career and Retirement Coach and Facilitator who works with corporate leaders in small to mid-size businesses, across the span of their careers. She helps them to accelerate business outcomes and team performance, navigate their own career path, and transition to retirement with ease using proven methodologies and strategies that get results. If you would like to uncover and address hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your success, leverage your strengths, and accelerate your progress toward the results you desire, contact Sherry for a complimentary consultation.

Transformational Presence Series: Part Four: The Four Levels of Engagement

March 15, 2018 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

In the final blog of this series on Transformational Presence, I’d like to share a model with you called the Four Levels of Engagement. The purpose behind this model is to bring awareness to how we ‘show up’ in relation to the daily events and circumstances we face in our personal and professional lives. This model is really just a description of what we’re all experiencing internally, all the time. When we work through this model, we’re choosing to slow down enough to see the inner workings of our level of engagement. We can take any situation or challenge and notice how we engage with it in a particular way.

To explain and demonstrate this model, let’s take a situation that we’ve likely all experienced at some point in our lives – a client or colleague who frequently is late for, misses or cancels meetings at the last minute. You are now faced with the fifth time in two months that this has occurred.

Drama

So, let’s step into the first level of engagement which is Drama. The initial internal dialogue might go something like this. “Are you kidding me?”, “What is he thinking?”, “I’m honoring the time on my calendar for him, why can’t he do the same?” That’s the level of engagement of Drama. So, I know none of you reading this EVER goes to that place of drama, right? But, I’ll admit, sometimes, I can go to a dramatic place. So Drama is an either/or, black or white, whose fault is it, type of space. It’s a criticism or a complaint. And then, after there has been time to vent, we might start to move into another level of engagement which is Situation.

Situation

Now, Situation sounds like this. “So, I’m going to need to address this. Let me sit down and prepare and I’ll go through the 5 steps to having a difficult conversation so I can take care of this.” Situation is about fixing the problem. It’s about getting it off my desk, moving on, getting it over with and getting it done. Often, for a while, these situational approaches will work, as has been pointed out earlier in this series. The problem-solving done here will likely lead to an okay result but one that typically isn’t sustainable for the long haul. So, when we run into the same situation again, we look for the next solution or drop back into Drama again and then shift back into Situation.

Choice

At some point, if we’re willing to go deeper, there’s a third option that shows up where we begin to notice there’s an invitation to ask the question, “Who do I want to be in this situation?” or “How do I want to show up?” Taking this deeper perspective breaks out of Drama and Situation into Choice, which is the next level of engagement. So, as we ask ourselves those questions, the answer in this circumstance might be, “I want to be a person who is both compassionate toward my client’s (or colleague’s) competing priorities and confident that we’ll reach a solution that works for both of us.” So that is who this situation is asking for the individual to be and that’s the individual’s choice to show up that way.

Opportunity

From Choice it’s rather easy to move into the 4^th level of engagement which is Opportunity. So, let’s take this same situation into Opportunity. What’s the hidden opportunity of the situation? What wants to happen or evolve out of this? So, as we step into opportunity, there is an opportunity here to evolve as a leader. A leader who not only demonstrates deep commitment and caring for clients or colleagues but also demonstrates the same level of caring and commitment to themselves. That is what wants to emerge.

Four Levels of Engagement Exercise

Now that you have a sense of each of these levels, you’re going to have a chance to play this game. It works best if you physically stand up and step into each of the different levels. If you remain seated, then simply choose a different spot on the floor or around the room to focus on for each level.

Bring to mind a challenging situation with a client, manager or colleague. It could be something current or from the past.

Choose a spot that represents Drama.
Step into the drama of your challenging situation. Close your eyes if you’d like. Really hear, in your mind, what’s happening.
Notice and ask yourself “What’s going on?”

Step back to a neutral spot and repeat the steps above replacing Drama with Situation, then repeat again with Choice, and finally, with Opportunity.

Four Levels of Engagement Debrief

What did you experience? Where has your level of engagement been in past interactions with this person?

What would be different if you approached the challenge from Choice and Opportunity?

How can you apply your awareness of the Four Levels of Engagement in your life and work starting today?

I invite you to share what you discover in the Comments section.

Summary

When we engage with the events and circumstances of life primarily from Drama and Situation, we spend our time primarily on struggle and problem-solving. It can be that feeling of putting out one fire after another. Ultimately, this can be exhausting. On the other hand, when we engage with life mostly from Choice and Opportunity, we step into a powerful place. We are no longer buffeted about by circumstances and choose how we want to respond and focus on the potential that wants to emerge. I invite you to apply the Four Levels of Engagement model in your own life and see what happens.

If you missed the earlier parts of this series, please click here for Navigating a Complex World, here for Part One – The Three Questions, here for Part Two – Becoming Mindful, and here for Part Three – Working with What Is.

For more information about Transformational Presence, please visit: www.transformationalpresence.org

Derived from: Seale, Alan. Transformational Presence: How To Make a Difference In a Rapidly Changing World and Transformational Presence: The Tools, Skills and Frameworks. Topsfield, MA: The Center for Transformational Presence, 2017. Used with permission.

About the Author: Sherry Dutra is a Talent Development and Career Coach and Facilitator who believes we each have far more potential than we typically tap in to. She helps you learn how to step into your full potential so you can create consistent, optimal performance for yourself and your team with less stress and more enjoyment. If you would like to uncover and address hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your success, leverage your strengths, and accelerate your progress toward the results you desire, contact Sherry for a complimentary consultation.

Transformational Presence Series: Part Three: Working with What Is

February 23, 2018 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

When was the last time you were faced with a difficult situation or circumstance at home or at work and the first thing that came to mind was “how can I fix this”? If you’re like most people, this has probably occurred more than once just in the past week. In fact, being a great problem-solver is encouraged, valued and what we are taught to do. Honestly, this is one of my own strengths and I have loved the satisfaction of “solving problems”. Yet, as discussed in previous posts, fixing the problem doesn’t tend to work for the long term. Often, the problem will arise again somewhere down the road. What if, as Alan Seale states, “a problem is not something to be solved; it’s a message to be listened to”?

Our role then would be to learn how to hear the message, discover what wants to unfold, and work in partnership with that potential to create something new. Quantum physics tells us that, at the most basic level, everything is made up of particles of moving, vibrating energy. Consequently, there is an energy that exists within any situation or circumstance. One of the fundamental principles of Transformational Presence is that “energy cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be transformed”. Solving the problem typically doesn’t transform the energy and this is the reason that the same or similar problem reemerges.

When we are faced with what we would call a problem, we tend to “push against” it and often end up making it worse. When we “push against”, we focus on what’s not working and give more power to it, causing it to persist. If we accept whatever situation we are faced with and flow with it, rather than push against it, things start to get easier. “Flowing with” is about focusing on what wants to happen or emerge from the circumstance. It doesn’t mean we have to like what’s going on. It also doesn’t mean that we are acquiescing to it. We are just acknowledging what is happening right now and partnering with what wants to emerge to discover our next steps. Using the Three Fundamental Questions from Part One of this series will help you identify those next steps.

Taking this perspective is something that requires practice and continual reminders. I find that “pushing against” a circumstance is often my initial reaction. Yet, continued practice, allows me to step back, “flow with” and respond.

If you’d like to explore this concept of “push against/flow with” in relation to a challenge you are facing, please click below and I will walk you through an exercise so that you can experience it for yourself. I invite you to share what you discover in the Comments section.

If you missed the earlier parts of this series, please click here for Navigating a Complex World, here for Part One – The Three Questions and here for Part Two – Becoming Mindful.

For more information about Transformational Presence, please visit: www.transformationalpresence.org

Derived from: Seale, Alan. Transformational Presence: How To Make a Difference In a Rapidly Changing World and Transformational Presence: The Tools, Skills and Frameworks. Topsfield, MA: The Center for Transformational Presence, 2017. Used with permission.

Transformational Presence Series: Part Two – Becoming Mindful

January 22, 2018 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

What does becoming mindful mean to you? We hear so much now about mindfulness and know that it is being practiced by an ever widening array of people including doctors, dancers, business executives, athletes, students, parents, professionals, etc. For good reason. Both science and experience have shown the positive impact of becoming more mindful on all aspects of our lives, both at work and at home. Definitions of mindfulness vary but all seem to coalesce around similar themes. Mindful magazine defines mindfulness as “being fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us”.

This ability to be present with whatever is happening right now, rather than fretting about the past or worrying about the future is one key to navigating a complex world. To develop Transformational Presence, starting a practice of becoming mindful provides an excellent foundation. To get you started, I invite you to listen to my recording of the Becoming Mindful exercise. In less than 5 minutes, you’ll have an opportunity to be still, take a pause, and listen and notice in a new way.

Come back to this as often as you can. The more that you practice, the easier it will become and the more benefit you will derive from it. It can be helpful, especially in the beginning, to do this exercise several times per day – perhaps in the morning, at mid-day, and again in the evening. Create consistency in your practice from day to day. Over time, you will begin to notice that your ability to stay present, to respond rather than react, and to sense into what wants to happen next will expand.

Consider experimenting with using this mindfulness practice in conjunction with The Three Questions from Part One of this series. Notice how the quality of your responses starts to change as you become more present and centered.

Please click below to listen to the Becoming Mindful exercise and I invite you to share your progress in the Comments section.

If you missed the earlier parts of this series, please click here for Navigating a Complex World and here for Part One – The Three Questions.

For more information about Transformational Presence, please visit: www.transformationalpresence.org

Derived from: Seale, Alan. Transformational Presence: How To Make a Difference In a Rapidly Changing World and Transformational Presence: The Tools, Skills and Frameworks. Topsfield, MA: The Center for Transformational Presence, 2017. Used with permission.

Do You Take Responsibility?: True Leadership Starts with This

April 13, 2017 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself.” ~ Jim Rohn

When was the last time you complained about a person or a situation? When have you had anything turn out differently than you wanted, either at work or at home, and you found yourself blaming someone else for the outcome? Come on, be honest. I know I’ve done it and still catch myself doing it. It’s likely that you have blamed or complained at one time or another. It’s a common response and one that most of us learned as a part of growing up. Yet, how would your success in life be enhanced if you took full responsibility for your results?

The Power of Choice

In every moment, you have a choice. Recognizing that you are always at choice and that you are responsible for your results leads to personal empowerment. Think about it. If you believe that your results are in the hands of external circumstances, then you give away your power to create what you want in every aspect of your life, including your work as a leader. While studying Jack Canfield’s Success Principles, I chose to develop an on-going practice of incorporating the principles into my life. Principle #1 – Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life – sets the foundation. Understanding this principle intellectually and fully embracing it are two different things. I am still a work in progress on this myself and I continue to integrate it a bit more each day.

A Leader’s Story

Here’s a simple example of not taking full responsibility. John was asked to take on a new, exciting project. In order to free up the time to devote to the new assignment, he delegated another important project to Tom, a member of his team. Tom is experienced and has the skills needed to handle the project. So, John spends a minimal amount of time outlining the project and expects that Tom has what he needs. Three weeks later, John gets a phone call from a very unhappy customer who is checking in on the delegated project and wants to know why they haven’t received the agreed to deliverable. The customer, who highly values dependability, tells John that they are going to seek a new vendor for future projects.

The Responsibility Formula

Many years ago, Dr. Robert Resnick introduced Jack Canfield to a simple formula that illustrates 100% responsibility remarkably well. The formula is E + R = O or Event + Response = Outcome. Let’s look at this example through the lens of E + R = O.

In this situation:
E = John had an opportunity to take on an exciting new project which required a delegation of something else on his plate to free up time.

R = John selected an experienced person, Tom, to take on the delegation and spent a small amount of time passing the project over.

O = An important deadline was missed and the company lost future business with the client.

Clearly, John wasn’t happy with the outcome. He has two choices when he encounters an outcome he doesn’t like:

He can blame the event (E) for his lack of results (O). So, in this example, he could blame his boss for the timing of the new project that caused him to have to delegate in the first place. He could blame Tom for not delivering on the delegated project. Perhaps he finds a way to blame the economy, the weather, his dog, etc. You get the picture. There are many influences that can impact results or outcomes but if those influences determined success, then no one experiencing them would succeed. Yet, there are countless examples of those who experienced similar circumstances and were successful. So, the event itself does not lead directly to a particular outcome.
John could change his response (R) to the event (E) until he reaches his desired outcome (O). In the future, for instance, John could take a more deliberate approach to delegating an assignment. He could set clear expectations and ensure alignment, build in periodic check-ins, work together to develop a plan of action, ask Tom where he feels he needs support, etc. In any situation, John can control his response. So when the choices you make don’t lead to the results you want, you can seek to understand what occurred. Then, you can determine what steps to take to get back on track versus blaming or complaining. Also, as events occur, you can proactively determine the outcome you’d like to achieve and respond accordingly.

Call to Action

While this principle may be easy to understand, it is not easy to implement. It’s an on-going journey of paying attention to the results you’re producing and what responses have led to those results. Ask yourself:

What did I do or not do that led to that result?
What do I need to do differently next time to get the result I want?

Since taking 100% responsibility can feel rather daunting, start with 5% more. Ask yourself, if I were to take 5% more responsibility for my leadership effectiveness, I would… and jot down your answers. Then, put an action plan in place to follow through on your commitment. Over time, this will naturally become a part of who you are.

Join me in the practice of integrating this core principle into your life and watch your results.

About the Author: Sherry Dutra is a Talent Development and Career Coach and Facilitator who helps you create consistent, optimal performance using all your capacity and potential in both your work and life. If you would like to uncover and address hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your success, leverage your strengths, and accelerate your progress toward the results you desire, contact Sherry for a complimentary consultation.

A Blueprint for Leadership Mastery

February 15, 2017 By Sherry Dutra Leave a Comment

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” ~ Aristotle

Core Leadership Skills

Fundamentally, there are a collection of key skills that prepare someone to step into a leadership role. These include things like the ability to:

communicate effectively,
influence others,
be adaptable and flexible,
drive for results,
build cohesive teams,
delegate and empower,
make decisions and problem-solve,
think strategically and
develop talent.

While every leader should have the opportunity to learn and build skill in these areas, skill-building alone is not enough to create leadership mastery. Have you ever noticed that regardless of your skill level, there are some days you’re “on” and some days you aren’t? There are some days you are filled with confidence and others where you question your ability? Some days where you crank out the results you want and others where you’re distracted and have difficulty staying focused on a project or goal?

What is Leadership Mastery?

All of the challenges that you face as a leader, no matter how skilled, come down to one thing. The one thing that changes everything is the understanding of, implications for, and ability to control the energy of performance. You know as well as I do that your competency level doesn’t shift from day to day. Your energy, however, is fluctuating all the time. Your energy is what determines how well your skills and competencies are expressed in any situation and what your outcomes will be. Leadership mastery, then, is about:

understanding the nature of the energy of performance,
utilizing that knowledge to create the conditions for optimal performance, and
making any necessary tweaks as any specific situation unfolds.

The energy that a leader presents in any situation is influenced by a number of different elements.

Mental ability that allows for clarity and focus
Emotions that are experienced throughout each day
Social factors that relate to your interactions with others
Environmental factors that relate to the conditions in which you are performing
Physical factors related to your level of health and wellbeing
Spiritual factors that speak to the connection you have with a sense of purpose, meaning and motivation.

When your energy is out of alignment and you’re feeling a bit “off”, you might experience anxiety, fear, worry, lack of confidence, or lack of motivation to name a few. How often do you actually get the outcomes or results that you want when this is going on? Likely, not very often. So how do you turn this around and have your energy work for you rather than against you?

Your Blueprint for Leadership Mastery

There are 5 key components to unleash your full leadership potential. Whether you run your own small business or you are leading a large organization, the foundation of your performance is built on these components. These 5 components make up COR.E Leadership Dynamics.

Component 1: Creating Your Plan
Self-awareness, a clear vision and specific goals are the essence of this component. Having a complete picture of the performance you want to create is critical.

Component 2: Establishing Your Energy and Performance Foundation
Energy fluctuations create inconsistent results. To sustain consistency and performance excellence, you must learn to manage your energy. Explore leadership mastery, understand the energy of performance, and identify and address blocks that stand in the way of your potential.

Component 3: Finding and Harnessing Your Performance Influencers
Earlier, I mentioned the 6 elements that influence your performance in any moment. Recognizing and understanding the impact of those influencers in the moment allows you to make immediate adjustments that keep you firing on all cylinders or get you back on track if things are going awry.

Component 4: Mastering the 10 COR.E Disciplines
Successful leaders have developed a personal approach or philosophy that keeps them motivated, resilient and aware of opportunities that present themselves. This component helps you to develop your own philosophy, built on the foundation of the 10 COR.E Disciplines, that will tap into your true leadership potential and performance.

Component 5: Optimizing and Sustaining Your Leadership Success Formula
An important element of this component is to embrace the need to evolve your approach over time. The world is a rapidly changing place and developing the capacity to be flexible and adaptable in the face of uncertainty is key to success.

My Invitation to You

If you would like to learn more about how COR.E Leadership Dynamics can help you to maximize your energy and optimize your performance to be the best leader you can be, please click here.